Hello my lovely.

You know that I strive to be positive at all times here on this little blog. That hasn’t changed. But as I wrote in my personal maifesto earlier this week, it’s also alright to admit when I’m having a hard time with something.

I had a hard time feeling grateful this week, guys. I am feeling a lot of other, opposite of grateful feelings. Feelings that have shaken me, that have scared me. I’m confronting what feels like a bunch of demons right now, from a bunch of different life segments. Everything feels highly out of balance & deeply uncomfortable.

All this to say that it’s a slightly shorter love-list this week. I had a really difficult time coming up with ten things every day that I felt grateful for. Which I know is horrible, & totally a first-world problem.

But I also wanted to be honest with you, my friend. So here it is, a shorter gratitude list than normal, but still a list of things I loved this week nonetheless.

Getting flirted with. What person doesn’t like a little romantic energy thrown their way? Whenever I’m feeling particularly like I need it, I just go to the Quickie around the corner from my house. BAM. Instant flirtation & mood boost.

Working on my play. It’s a slow process, & I’ve given myself a year to write it, but the fact that the window above my desk is covered in post-its makes me happy.

The free library at my work! It’s one of those take-some-books-leave-some-books deals. I love it.

Caring for my orchids. There are two minature phaels & one full-sized one which are just loving my new place.

Being with myself. I’m fun company. Who knew?!

Working a lot. I am nearing the end of a 12-days-straight stint, & although I am truly exhausted (I really am going to sleep all weekend!), it’s also really rewarding to know that I’m helping an office run smoothly. It helps to know that I’m good at my job.

The Walrus. I’ve been reading snippets on the bus & on my balcony when I get some time to myself. It’s wonderful. I feel smarter already!

Going for the first few runs of the year. Actually, the first few runs in about four years! I had some injuries that have finally healed, & I’m back out on the running path. Mostly thanks to the Zombies Run! app. Best $1.99 I ever spent.

Speaking of which, being proactive about my health. I made a doctor’s appointment I’ve been dreading.

Taking a million photos with my phone. It’s true: the best camera is the one you have with you!

Knowing my own power. Oozing confidence.

Old people, in a park, weilding swords at 8:00 on a Saturday morning.

WEARING SANDALS, GUYS.

Other little things which made me smile…

Armloads of jangly bracelets * Sparkly manicures * Books on meditation * Writing a manifesto * Positive feedback * Tulips * Making people smile with silly little things * Connections * Planning a solo weekend getaway * Feeling my feelings * 8Tracks! * Building new good habits * When my friends favourite my tweets * Vega Smoothie in Mango is the most delicious protein powder I have every had in my life! * Patio season * Exploring my career options * Loving myself * Making mix tapes * Wearing sunscreen * Wearing sundresses * Paying attention to the details * Being valuable * Reading on the balcony * Rolling my eyes for comic effect

What about you, darling? What are you grateful for this week? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

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Oh my lovely! Here’s what’s been making my heart glow this week!

First dates. Even if they go absolutely nowhere. It’s so much fun getting to know a new person, & then I have new stories to share! Fair warning: I am writing a play about dating. So stories might end up in there.

Pulling my summer clothes out of storage. Putting away the deep-winter duds. Gosh, that feels so good. Of course, now I need to have another clothing swap… & probably shave my legs.

Walking around my city. I love this city more than is probably reasonable, & there’s not much I enjoy more than strolling around with my camera on a warm evening.

Amazing spring weather. It’s finally here. We’re coming into my favourite time of year, & I couldn’t be happier.

Putting on lotion before bed. I’ve been really getting into this lately. There’s not much I like better than lotioning up before slipping into bed.

Growing my own lettuce. I was gifted some planting equipment, can’t wait to get these little babies started so I can eat free lettuce. 

Feeling my feelings. For a long time I have been the type of gal who kind of sits on her feelings & doesn’t really dig into them. Now, thanks to acting class, I have been sitting in them, staying with them, figuring out how they feel in my body, & working through them. It’s actually kind of a breakthrough.

Getting to know myself better. All this feeling my feelings business has given me a lot of insight into who I am & what I want. I have things to do.

Being appreciated by my employer. All of us admins got a sweet little Bath & Body Works gift bag for Administrative Professional’s Day. Mine included a mini Espresso Bar candle, which I have been pining after every time I go in there!

Building my Summer 2013 mix. This year’s is going to be epic.

Handwashing my delicates. Okay, that’s a weird one. But I really enjoy taking very good care of the things I care about.

Being cast as Charlotte in 7 Stories. We’re doing this one in my acting class, & I absolutely cannot wait to play Charlotte, the woman who keeps trying to kill her lover so she can keep their relationship alive.

Mailbox. My inbox is finally manageable!

Sharing EFT with people. Look, okay, I know most of you think it’s for crap. But it has changed my life in such a positive way, & I love showing it to people when they ask.

Carrying things to do in my purse. When I am stuck waiting for someone or something, I am never, ever bored. Scripts, writing, a book, magazines… I love being able to occupy myself.

Noah’s morning Olympics. Every morning they start around 7:00. There’s the 500 meter run-batshit-crazy-around-the-apartment, the high jump-up-&-down-from-the-dresser, & his new favourite, speed walking-on-my-hair.

Listening to my intuition. I am trying to get better at this.

Amazing, helpful friends. Without getting too into details, I was really in the lurch earlier this week & a dear, dear friend came through for me, unbidden, at the last minute. I will always, always appreciate this.

Taking care of myself. Okay, this is kind of a weird one, but here we go. I got a bunch sick this week, & it’s the first time in a long time that I don’t have someone to take care of me when I am. So I did it myself. It’s very empowering to do so. (Although all I want to do is crawl under the covers & cry myself to sleep.)

Revisiting my goals & wants lists. It’s been far too long. It was about time I took a good, hard look at where I was going, & who I want to take with me. I needed a refresher. I am going to be writing an update to my 2012 goals post soon.

Standing up for myself. I had someone be needlessly nasty to me yesterday. I took not one whit of that business.

Bad days. Because they don’t happen often, but they make me appreciate the good days all that much more.

Other Little Things…

Patton Oswalt, always, forever * Human Giant * Getting organized * Sidedoor Restaurant * Fresh roses * Wearing pretty dresses * Accessorizing * Unpacking treasures * Two new orchids & a tiny jade * Going for car rides with the windows down & the music up * Healthy food * Making sangria plans * Balcony sitting * Making a million plans to see people—it’s like my life blows up once the weather is fine * Living centrally (again) * Cranberry juice * Being brave enough to talk to cute boys & handsome men * All the plants in my life * Spring rain * Making an effort every day * Doing the dishes * Handy fellas * Men in uniform * Unpacking my foot spa * Swiffering the floors (weird that “swiffering” is now a verb to me!) * Building my tribe * Bringing positive energy to any & every situation * Filtered water * Especially when it’s ice cold * Free health care * Advil 400s * Rearranging cut flowers * The morning tidy-up * Yesterday was my first day in sandals! * Paying attention to other people’s energy * The Moon Room * Prosecco * Tying up loose ends * Being respected & appreciated * Clinique Black Honey Almost Lipstick * Excellent sleep * Post-Its * Almonds * Stretching * Pressed’s vegan sandwiches

What about you? What every little thing are you grateful beyond grateful for? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

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Oh hello my lovely, hello my darling, hello my ragtime gal!

I hope you’ve had an amazing week so far, & that you’ve taken time each day to notice the things you are grateful for.

I make a little list every day. Ten things. Which means when it comes time to write these posts they are so easy, because I have a huge document to choose from!

Without further ado, the Thursday love list!

My office job. I know it sounds silly, but working part-time in an office has really been an absolute blessing. All of my colleagues have been (mostly) wonderful, & it’s very rewarding to help them. I’ve been picking up a ton of hours lately, too, which makes me really happy! Plus I get to dress up, which is my favourite.

Being excited about the theatre again. For a long time I was starting to feel my passion waning for theatre. But now that I’m acting again, & getting really excited about my classes, I find attending theatre to be so much more rewarding than it has been this year.

Creating legendary outfits. My creativity is really starting to soar now that it’s spring! I use index cards to figure things out & I love it.

Planning, planning, planning. Adventures. Outfits. Anything, really. As long as I can use an idex card for it.

Morning muffins. It’s basically cake for breakfast. We all know this.

Being alone. I am having more fun alone than is probably reasonable. I am really enjoying spending time with me!

Kitty-cat love. I seriously love my cat so much, the little idiot. I love the little pissed-off snort/exhale thing he does when he doesn’t get his way. I love that he purrs like a motorboat. I love that he just loves everyone unconditionally. I could learn a lot from that beast.

Sometimes forgetting my phone. I left my phone at home by accident on Sunday morning, & although it was a little irritating the whole day, it was nice to just take a break & really notice where I was when I was doing stuff.

Cosmetic love. I spend my Shopper’s Optimum points this week ($85 in free stuff from Shopper’s? YES PLEASE.), & picked up Benefit Cosmetic’s Instant Brow Pencil. UGH I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I am also crazy about Smackers Lip Frosting in Birthday; it tastes like absolute cake.

Coming to big, big realizations about love & the way that I feel it. I was talking to someone about a friend of mine, & I referred to her as “My Tania”. The response to that was that it was odd that I had “claimed” her. But I don’t think that’s what it’s about for me. I think that once you love someone, especially someone who is a very dear friend, rather than a lover, they will always, always be yours, regardless of whether or not you drift apart. You give a part of yourself to them, they give a part of themselves to you.

Having a “plant guy”. I was on the bus the other day & this woman in front of me was carrying this gorgeous plant. I snapped a sneaky photo of it & sent it to my plant guy to ask him what it was, & of course he knew. I’ve yet to stump him. (It was a tradescantia, if you’re curious!)

Walking around my new neighbourhood, taking note of all the sweet date places there are nearby.

Talking on the phone, with pals. I’m having a telephone renaissance! I think it has something to do with the fact that I can use headphones & be hands-free, so I can do other stuff while I’m chatting.

My Doc Marten Darcie boots are getting so much wear this season! Ditto my black & grey terry striped blazer from F21 a million years ago.

Learning about new plays. I badly want to read A Girl’s Guide to Chaos by Cynthia Heimel.

Transferring phone calls. It’s weird, but it makes me feel powerful & magical.

Taking pride in my work. I feel really good about working for Team Realty. Although ask me how I feel after working 12 days in a row, starting next Monday.

The sounds of the city. After living outside the downtown core for so long, I really relish the sounds of the city all around me. It makes me feel more vital & alive.

Fellas. Fellas who are handy. Fellas who are handsome. Fellas who are chivalrous.

Amazing vintage dresses. I love taking something strange & making something beautiful.

Other Little Things…

Short sleeves means wearing armloads of bracelets * Sweet, sweet text messages * Black & white vertically striped stockings * Dinner with Michael * A great big stretch first thing in the morning * Friendly people * Implementing change slowly * Wearing my hair curly * New earrings * When comics I respect favourite my tweets * Getting better at mixing prints in my outfits (what can I say, it’s the little things) * Leaving my windows open a crack to air out my apartment * Get On the Busfield * Getting fancy & going to galas * Sweet video messages from my pals * Arrowroot cookies dunked in black coffee * Annie Lefebvre * Acting class, acting class, acting class! * Lollipops * Chinese housewares stores * Weekends off * To that end, five days off in a row! * Planning double dates * Carrying scripts around in my bag * EFT * Getting my house sorted * Writing every day * Making new friends (Hi, Noa!) * I’m really into reading right now * Making weekend plans * Dinner with my acting classmates * Hanging out with lady-friends * Flirting & being generally charming * Pink highlighters * Early morning sun * Long walks alone in the rain, under my pink umbrella (it’s very similar to this one) * Kitty cuddles! * Clean sheets * Taking on new challenges

What about you, sweet darling? What are you grateful beyond grateful for this week? Please share in the comments, let’s keep the love going!

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Oh heavens! It’s Thursday again! Warning: great big giant love list ahead!

My body. What a miraculous machine I am! I somehow didn’t get sick this week by I think willing it so? I don’t care how it happened, but I didn’t get the cold I was sure I was going to get last Thursday!

Sweethearts. Especially the ones who offer to take care of me when I fear I’m getting sick!

Vine. Instant. Obsession.

If you use Vine, follow me! I’m all over that ish. Also I had no idea my friends were so hilarious in six-second bursts!

Delicious, delicious things in my mouth: Hot, dark, Costa Rican coffee; crazy-good oatmeal every morning (my current obsession is almonds, raisins, cardamom, & palm sugar); coconut cream Larabars; Sunday breakfasts; big, healthy bowls of salad for dinner… the list goes on & on!

Getting to know my new neighbourhood. I am in dangerous proximity to both Auntie Loo’s Treats & Pressed!

New apartment, new apartment, new apartment! The light is amazing, the way it streams in. Since it’s a lot smaller than where I was before (I went from a four-bedroom house to a one-bedroom apartment), I had to get rid of a lot of things, & even though I’m not completely unpacked yet, I have been seeing that having less stuff makes it easier to stay organized.

Songza’s “Sophisticated 90s” playlist. It’s like a selection of all the best stuff from Michael’s record collection! I am kind of obsessed with listening to music all the time.

The Polish meat counter in the deli on the first floor of my building. I don’t want to eat any of the things, but they look neat!

Spring nail polish colours coming out of storage. Currently my nails are neon pink, & are growing into the shape I want them to be. I have a couple that are pretty much perfect.

Shopping for crown molding. I want to make this shoe rack for my bedroom.

Maybe, finally, figuring out my hair? I have been fighting with my hair for basically forever, & I think it’s getting to a point where I can do decent things with it.

Catching up on television I love. Girls, Mad Men, Parks & Recreation, The Office… All so good, you guys!

Giving up on shows that aren’t doing it for me anymore. Sorry, Community & Sony. You made a mistake firing Dan Harmon. The best thing that can be said about the new season is that it is uneven.

Drinking loads of water from my new Bobble pitcher. It filters SO FAST. Also, & this makes me feel like a bit of an old lady, I am really enjoying hot water with lemon first thing in the morning!

Daytime television. I don’t get to watch it that often, so every once in a while when I catch Ellen or Live With Kelly & Michael, I enjoy it more than is probably reasonable.

Falling back in love. Don’t get too excited—falling back in love with Twitter. Also kind of falling back in love with being by myself again.

Being on the mend. Both my neck & left hip were doing weird, painful things this week, & while my hip is still sore it is mending, & my neck is better!

Believing that everything happens for a reason. I have been facing some pretty major disappointments lately, & yesterday I was smacked with another huge one. Strangely, though, it didn’t bother me like I thought it would, I took it very calmly, & immediately started looking for the bright side. I don’t know that I’ve ever been able to deal with disappointment that calmly before.

High of 18 today! Spring is really happening!

Knowing what I’m going to wear to the Prix Rideau Awards gala on Sunday. It took me until late last night to figure it out, but I think I’m finally there. I also realized how grateful I should be because I have a selection of beautiful cocktail dresses to choose from for an event like this.

Unpacking my Fryes. You don’t even know how happy this made me, guys!

I make a headset look sooooo goooood. I am kind of into this.

I’m really into taking portraits of this idiot right now.

Other Little Things…

Noah being crazy-sweet in the new apartment * Keeping plants alive * Daydreaming about summer road trips * Obsessed with doing the dishes * Mad organizing sessions * Dressing up for the office again * Sticking to my schedule * Huge lists of house things * The longest showers * Robaxacet!!! * Nighttime telephone chats * I am still crazy about my Betseyville bag & get complimented on it all the time * Planning meals & eating loads of fresh produce * Dressing like I’m strolling the Rive Gauche * Banana bread baking dates * Cleaning & doing laundry * Having a much smaller coffee table * Reading The Walrus on the bus * Not having my television hooked up yet * Really connecting with people * Feeling gratitude about the money I earn * Even though I didn’t end up having to, knowing I have people I can count on to let me use their shower when the hot water in my building isn’t working * Learning to play backgammon * Writing out my gratitude list every morning * Hugs * Planning * Clearing my schedule * Lying in bed & listening to the rain * Organizing my purse * Birds chirping outside the window * Helping people when I can * Deep, deep cleaning my old house (very satisfying) * Making my new colleagues laugh * When new clients turn into new friends * Eating cookies in bed * The way Noah just completely ingratiates himself to company * Finding my perfume stash as I unpack

What about you, little darling? What gets your motor running this week? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

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Oh hello, old friend. Let’s take a moment to be grateful for all that is wonderful in our lives, shall we? Because you know there is so much that is wonderful. I know it too. Sometimes I get caught up in the everyday stress of life but then I come back to writing down the things which make me smile & the things which make my heart burst & I remember all the love in my life & it brings me back to centre.

Getting settled in to my new pad. It’s slow going. I am being quite meticulous in my organization & putting away of things, since the new place is so tiny. Pics will come once it’s a bit more There, though!

Empire Of Dirt. So, this is kind of a big deal—I’ve been cast in my first professional theatre production! It’s a very small one, but man oh man is it ever exciting. Details to follow as they unfold!

Cilantro pesto & black bean wraps. I made this recipe earlier this week & it’s all I want to eat, ever. I wrap those black bean lovelies in a corn tortilla or a big lettuce leaf with a bunch of cucumber & avocado & chipotle Tabasco & then I eat it. (Fair warning, there are days when I maybe can’t stop farting right now.)

Little Things: Working the door for Crush Improv * Housewarming gifts! * Pho * Blogging * Gummy candy * Amazing meals * Booking clients

What about you, darling? What wonderful things happened to you this week? I’d love it if you shared in the comments!

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